Me-ness
we took the long way from the powell station by accident. unseasonably warm in the city, we were almost sweating by the time we found the entrance. a bustle of people smiling and asking for cards or email addresses. i’m not sure what i expected. in some ways it was a throw back to the […]
Fog in the oakland is more than a cloak or ominous shadow, it is a living thing wafting its cloudy breath across the bay. Driving into it is like descending into another world. The air is moist, sound muffled, light distorted,. Foggy mornings filter the sun, leaving it an unimpressive white disk; as if […]
i spent christmas day in my apartment accompanied only by facebook, my cell phone, and pizza rolls. sounds sad, but i was technically at work. so as i tried (unsuccessfully) to connect to our server i edited various power points and watched the grayness of 7:45 am mellow into a rather beautiful afternoon. it might […]
Guilt is an interesting emotion…I guess you can call it an emotion. Like love or rage, it often defies logic. I would have assumed that I would be immune to guilt – my parents don’t use it on me, never have. But then again, maybe that is why it works so well, I’m not used […]
i hate myself even as i do it. "excuse me sister can i ask you a question." a quick nod no and i never even slow, never make eye contact. and my gut doesn't send me danger signals but i'm well trained. i don't talk to strangers. especially strange men. especially at night. and he […]
it doesn’t go away…it doesn’t fade…it doesn’t transform into some lesser thing. love remains…after misunderstandings and missed opportunities – beyond cultural borders and emotional boundaries…love remains. now what’s to be done with it once its time has passed – its potential for taking center stage quietly overlooked or taken for granted? we bury. we layer. […]
i’m not exactly sure when my philosophy on travel changed. my assumption, without much thought, is that it was in peace corps. i got used to two things…having plans fall apart mid execution, and having other people make the plans in the first place. either way…the results were interesting. i didn’t always know what would […]
i watched splendor in the grass tonight. stayed up later than i need be awake to see its bittersweet finish. and i can’t get one of the last scenes out of my head. not the famous shot of deanie – natalie wood – clad flawlessly in white walking beside bud – covered in oil; instead […]
how we give things and how they are taken are not always in agreement. a gesture in friendship can be taken as slight. i’ve recently slighted in the name of friendship. maybe for the sake of it. had no idea the damage my perspective could bring – my attempts to be anything but cruel. but […]
why i don't wear that dress anymore
“you sure did something to me when you spoke to me. i didn’t even need viagra. bam, through that brick wall back there.” the drums drowned out the competing music from some of the other stalls and it gave the old man an excuse to lean in to my ear after he tapped my shoulder […]
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