Last night I had a small meltdown. This was not a “no wire hanger – ever” kind of affair. In terms of melt, it was like stubborn government cheese; it gave around the edges but stayed mostly as it was. But still…
It wasn’t anything spectacular or big or especially heinous. Instead, I found myself responding strangely to something I’ve dealt with a hundred times: the current going out. It turned off as scheduled. It was midnight and I was sprawled across the bed bored and waiting for sleep. But as the room fell to unfocusable black I realized I hadn’t organized myself properly, I wasn’t sure where my flashlight was and I couldn’t find my house shoes; both necessary for padding to the bathroom in the middle of the night.
And so I had a mini – mostly internal – tantrum. All of a sudden I wanted electricity. I wanted to know to be able to flip a switch and have a room encased in shadow flood with light. I wanted my night to be dictated by my personal clock and not by the generator’s gas guzzling belly.
If I hadn’t extended my time here by three weeks I’d be in Monrovia right now preparing to depart Liberia. And while I’d still be held hostage to generators’ whims I would be a little closer to unblinking internet, potable water pouring forth gratuitously from faucets, and leafy green vegetables (and rice krispie treats) brimming from my plates – yes plates, as in plural!
It passed quickly. My little cheese hissy-fit passed in a moment and I drifted off to sleep. This morning I started the day with no hint of cheese on my face…three weeks and counting, I’m holding the cheese at bay.
i have faith in you! three weeks will fly by and then you’ll be off on the next adventure! i think you are amazing. i want to be like you when i grow up. love you!
i completely understand. the end of such a project must have you on pins and needles, especially since you have so many things planned out. i’m sure you are itching to move on.
i really hope we can connect when you get back in this region. i have summer plans that i will email you. perhaps you will find your way to me in the NE?