Me-ness

Linnea Ashley on April 20th, 2010

Last night I had a small meltdown. This was not a “no wire hanger – ever” kind of affair. In terms of melt, it was like stubborn government cheese; it gave around the edges but stayed mostly as it was.  But still… It wasn’t anything spectacular or big or especially heinous. Instead, I found myself […]

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Linnea Ashley on April 16th, 2010

“Morning-o!” I called out to friends in front of the County Health Department building. “You are busy with work?” someone called after me. “Small small,” I replied; a very West African response which – like adding “o” to the ends of words, I’ve taken to doing. I’m not sure what feeds my inclination to not […]

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Linnea Ashley on March 17th, 2010

Soft like the final raindrops of a lingering storm – its rage exhausted – I heard the patter footsteps. My paraffin lamp pinned my shadowed self to the dark walls while my flesh self crouched on a wooden chair hugging my knees and repeated a whispered mantra over and over. “please don’t get into my […]

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Linnea Ashley on March 8th, 2010

She looked at me a little confused. Her nose, in the center of a clear teak complexion, crinkled slightly as she shook her head. “hair is something we do as friends, you don’t pay for it.” I had pulled out LD ready to pay her as much for her cornrowing skill (I have more hair […]

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Linnea Ashley on February 9th, 2010

“you do not believe me but I swear to God.” He looked at me, the streetlight from across the well worn dirt road that separates my house from Mary Tiah’s casting shadows across his face. She and part of her family sat just out of earshot on their front porch. “when a Liberian man swears […]

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Linnea Ashley on February 9th, 2010

Food is one of the great narratives of my life, and yet I am still surprised at how much the taste and lingering delight of a good meal can dictate the texture of my day and orchestrate the flavor of my mood. Food. More than sustenance and survival, for me it is tantamount to joy. […]

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Linnea Ashley on February 8th, 2010

Food is one of the great narratives of my life, and yet I am still surprised at how much the taste and lingering delight of a good meal can dictate the texture of my day and orchestrate the flavor of my mood. Food. More than sustenance and survival, for me it is tantamount to joy. […]

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Linnea Ashley on January 21st, 2010

Life here is a fickle two-year-old. Yesterday was the first day she didn’t cry or cower behind the nearest person not me. Yesterday she walked up to me, her round chocolate face so cute and beaming, no pants, stomach distended with a huge bellybutton bulging out like an appendage. She smiled at me. Held out […]

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Linnea Ashley on January 13th, 2010

One match to light the coal pot. You’d think I’d discovered fire but no…I simply lit our coal stove with one match. Yesterday we went to Gutz’s house to fry potatoes and plantains on his coal pot. We gathered around to watch how to light it properly since for us it usually involves copious amounts […]

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Linnea Ashley on January 13th, 2010

Everything takes longer. Sick. Feeling it slink in after the giddy feeling of dodging it over breakfast…boiled casava and plaintains in sardine sauce that gagged me just so after a few bites. But I spit it out and smiled smugly believing triumph over heaving. But the day marched on. Longer than usual. And the feeling […]

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